I was thinking on this topic while watching one of my favorite movies last night, When Harry Met Sally and thought I would ask the audience what they think. Can men and women just be friends, or does sex get in the way?
Men and women seem biologically programmed to want to have sex with each other, and even if you're not having sex, the possibility that you could have it, can create tension among the sexes. I've been plagued with this question for awhile now, and am honestly curious to hear what people think, because I don't have the answer. I think a situation in which this can work is if the two friends are already in relationships with other people, or aren't even the least bit attracted to each other. But in many cases, at least one of the parties seems to be attracted to the other, and if that's the case then that man or woman will pursue the other and quickly cause tension in the friendship. I've had a lot of situations in my life where this tension is created in a friendship that I purely wanted to stay a friendship.
It's hard to bounce back once the cat's out of the bag, even if you don't have sex; but if you do have sex, in my experience, either I become emotional and the man withdraws or the man becomes emotional and I get scared away. Even if you do stay friends, it changes things... like you know a dark secret about the other person that you wish you didn't know. It's really hard, impossible even, to go back to the way things were before the sex happened and feelings got involved. In some cases, the best case scenario, the man and woman go on to have a committed relationship where they share their lives together, and have a foolproof relationship that was founded on friendship.
I'll let you decide. Share your thoughts in the comments below!
I think they can absolutely be just friends, even if both of them are not in a relationship with other people. For instance, my best guy friend is now married, but we were friends longgggg before he got married. Mind you, we did have sex one time, out of sheer loneliness and boredom. We were both "rebounding" from relationships gone south at the time, and I was adamant that it was the ONLY time I was ever going to have sex with him. I was never physically attracted to him... but mentally and spiritually definitely. LOL full disclosure, I did know that he always had a crush on me since he first met me, because he told me early on…
Interesting question, while I believe it is attainable, I don’t think it very wise especially if either party is already in a relationship. The reason being, that most relationships start out on a friendship level, and can easily grow to a more emotional and even physical one, especially under the right (or wrong) circumstances, like a fight or disagreement, this can make the other pasture seem all that much greener. Anyhoo that’s my take.
Uriah the Hittite thought it was problematic....
This is an issue I’ve struggled with also. The answer is: I don’t know the answer:) I do think that a deep friendship, a true friendship can be more intimate than a relationship that involves sex. I have a rule for myself as it pertains to men: he has to be a lot older than me, a lot younger, or a priest. That way there’s no chance of sex getting in the way. A priest I listen to on YouTube says: a friend is someone you want to waste time with. Meaning there’s no agenda but enjoying each other’s company and that God desires this kind of friendship with us. He just wants to spend TIME with us.
Men and women can be friends if there having sex that will eventually get it the way because sex for a man is physical and sex for a woman if it's not just a one night stand becomes emotion after the third or fourth time so it my opinion that if you stop having sex you can remain friends ☺️